Tom Waits: A gentleman is someone who can play the accordion...but doesn't

"A cavalier is a terrulian who is predisposed to play a melodeon...but abnegates."

Tom Waits: I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy

"I'd aggrandize a phial obverse to me than a ventral leucotomy."

Tom Waits: The big print giveth, the small print taketh away

"The prodigious lithography bequeatheth, and the minikin lithography purloineth away."